WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 12
It's 11am here. I slept til 3, got up, found coffee and pondered my situation. I pondered why I always feel the need to write "got up." Obviously I got up or I wouldn't be writing much now would I?
I'm on one of the greatest inventions known to man. The Hop on Hop off Bus. I love these wonders! No matter where I go, there they are. It is the first thing I do on a trip. I get the lay of the land. It's like an urban safari. I see my reflection in store windows and feel rather powerful and clever. The locals who look up at these things have contempt and mockery in their eyes. They are fools. Would they rather I pepper them with direction requests in my fancy broken Italian? I think not.
I can identify tourists by their fancy hats. None of us brought a hat so we all had to buy one for 100 bucks at the souvenir stands. We had no idea Italy was so freaking sunny and so freaking hot. We actually did know. Others told us and we googled it, but we didn't really absorb how important the temperature would be. We are also fat so we are sweaty and smiley. We point at everything. I am at the back of the bus and there is so much pointing I have nothing but John Travolta and Grease songs running through my head.
I wandered around the Colosseum, Circus Maximus and the Trevi Fountain, which is under construction but people are still tossing coins. It amuses me because some are just landing in wheel barrels or bouncing off the fence so kids are swiping them. By the time the person turns around all smiles that their wish will come true, I want to run over and go HAHA! like that kid on the Simpsons and tell them how it really went down. But I don't do that because I have left my cynicism and nastiness in Canada. I decided that I would be the happy traveller who loves it all and no matter what happens I will respond positively and smiley so nothing but good karma follows me around. I decided that after calling the cab driver a thief, but it's never too late to begin.
There is an amazing amount of graffiti here, so tomorrow I plan to tag this shit. hehehe. When in Rome and all.
Found a very cool joint and ate a massive plate of spaghetti.
So ends a marvellous day in Rome. I didn't see it all, but I am coming back, so hold that thought.
TO READ MORE OF MY EXPLOITS CLICK ON THAT TINY LITTLE ARROW AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE. THEY ARE IN REVERSE ORDER SO THE LAST PAGE IS ACTUALLY THE BEGINNING. ENJOY!
